Exodus: Gods and Kings was epically long. It had epic sets, epic costumes, and epic special effects.
It also Hoovered. Epically.
We were interrupted about twenty minutes into the film by the bone-jarring Emergency Notification, complete with strobe lights and creepy-calm voice instructing us to go the nearest exit. (A child had accidentally hit the button…) My boyfriend and I exited; he made certain all was safe, and we went back in (it was actually quite good to experience what would happen in the event of an emergency in a theater; with all of Sony’s troubles of late, I’m glad I know what to expect), but after the movie, I sort of wished we had just left and rented The Ten Commandments instead.
Watching the film, I kept trying to resist the urge to compare it to the Charleton Heston-led masterpiece, but I couldn’t; the comparison can’t be helped. Batman, even with his ridiculous Batman voice, is no Charleton Heston, and Joel Edgerton is no Yul Brynner. And the story told in this film is not the story recorded in the Bible, nor is it the story told in The Ten Commandments.
Note to script writers: when filming Biblical epics, don’t be afraid to use the Bible as source material: if the stories therein have stood the test of time this long, they probably have some decent plot-lines and won’t need to be hacked to pieces.
Parental caveats: Like most Bible stories, it’s violent and a bit over-the-top. Children who have trouble digesting the thought of God as vengeful and violent should not be taken to see this film. People who need God to be Only Loving All the Time should neither see the film or read the actual account in the scriptures.
“America is the first culture in jeopardy of amusing itself to death.” -John Piper
The sets, costumes, music and special effects of Ridley Scott’s attempt at a Biblical epic are wondrous. If he would have left out the dialogue entirely, and just given us a visual experience accompanied by Alberto Iglesias’ score, it would have been an exponentially better movie.
Alas, the actors speak, and in so doing, ruin the movie.
First, the script wanders around like the Hebrews in the wilderness, and it does so for what seems like at least forty years: it’s far too long, has no idea where to go, and no clear path to get there. There isn’t even a pillar of cloud by day or a pillar of fire by night, metaphorically or visually, in this exhausting film. Adding to the frustration, other key elements of the story are missing; the back and forth tense power struggle between Moses as the representative of God, with Aaron as his mouthpiece, and Rameses (“Let my people go!”) is entirely absent. In fact, Aaron’s key role in the story as Moses’ voice is just… missing. I guess Ridley figured The Batman Voice had the power to replace the character of Aaron in its entirety, but it really just makes the viewer more frustrated, especially since there was the added auditory irritation of many actors’ bizarre need to use British accents.
“And Moses stretched forth his rod toward heaven: and the Lord sent thunder and hail, and the fire ran along upon the ground; and the Lord rained hail upon the land of Egypt.
24 So there was hail, and fire mingled with the hail, very grievous, such as there was none like it in all the land of Egypt since it became a nation.” Exodus 9:23-24
Other problems: the hail is just hail; it’s never flaming. The beautiful climax of the story – the stunning display of God’s saving power when the Red Sea parts to provide the escape for the Hebrews – never happens. The viewer is left to assume the water has either evaporated or maybe slid over a bit as the Hebrews cross through a mud pit instead of on dry ground. The pattern of God commanding Moses to go to Pharaoh and Moses then pleading with Pharaoh on behalf of the Hebrews is not there. Also missing is the visual illustration that Moses was used as the instrument of God; the plagues occurred only after Moses stretched forth his rod and declared the will of God. Had Ridley or the script writers paid attention to this detail, the mental anguish of Moses, the guilt and the fury he must have had, could have been more clearly seen.
For all its length, the characters are poorly developed and largely rendered flat by the actors who portray them. Sigourney Weaver plays Tuya, Seti’s wife, a completely useless character she couldn’t save regardless of how hard she tried. She could have saved herself and her career the embarrassment and humiliation of a lot of bad reviews if she would have told that casting director no.
“And the Lord said unto Moses, Wherefore criest thou unto me? speak unto the children of Israel, that they go forward:
16 But lift thou up thy rod, and stretch out thine hand over the sea, and divide it: and the children of Israel shall go on dry ground through the midst of the sea.” Exodus14:15-16
There’s also the addition of unnecessary things: Ridley wanted some explosions, so there’s a whole flaming-arrow thing that results in a grain elevator explosion that’s just stupid. (He should really have thought about using the flaming hail to satisfy his appetite for explosions.) Also, Moses and Ramses have a strange stand-off during the crossing of the Red Sea that makes no logical sense; seriously-the Red Sea is about to crash onto these guys; the writers have to cheat to get Moses out of there in one piece.
There were times when I thought the script was going to improve. When Moses leaves Zipporah and his child, there is an opportunity to tell an aspect of the story that is lost in the common telling. But, the writers ignore it. Sigh…
The most frustrating part of the film for me was the relationship between Moses and God, and the way in which God was portrayed. He is shown as a child, literally, who is having a ridiculous temper tantrum, destroying land and livestock, inflicting merciless suffering, and killing children en masse just to get what he wants. It is a disturbing one-sided image, and leaves one wondering why any sane person would follow such a cruel and immature deity. God is rendered best when both His vengeance and His mercy are given equal weight. Here, He is a terror.
The film just stops after Moses gets the stone tablets, almost as if the writers ran out of printer ink and just went home. To give you a sense of the feeling I had when I walked out of the theater, I shall now follow their example.